I am concerned about a friend or co-worker

The collaborative nature of the entertainment industry necessitates working closely with others in stressful situations. Often we are the first people to notice the negative consequences that slowly present themselves when a friend or co-worker is caught in the downward spiral of alcohol or substance abuse.

Subtle changes in a friend or co-worker such as attendance problems, difficulty performing work, unsafe behaviors and social withdrawal begin to affect our work environment. We may find ourselves “covering” for someone whose work is affected by their alcohol or substance use. Problems may progress to the point that our own personal wellbeing and safety is compromised. How to handle this situation is unique in every case.

Below are a few basic guidelines. Click on each heading to find out more, or download a one-sheet PDF of this information.

What are the signs that a friend or co-worker may be substance dependent?

Are they preoccupied with alcohol or drugs
Has their use of alcohol or drugs caused problems for them or for you
Do they continue to use after they become aware that problems are/have occurred
Do they show signs of withdrawal symptoms when they have made an effort to stop
Do they have to partake in more alcohol or drugs in order to function or feel good
Have they made multiple attempts to control their intake without long term success
Is there more than one substance involved – such as alcohol and drugs

Are there signs of changing priorities as a result of dependency?

Personal relationships with coworkers/friends/family suffer
Avoiding meaningful social interaction in order to indulge
Personal hygiene and healthy lifestyle reduced
Inability to accept responsibility for actions
Is there a negative progression that impacts their interaction/behavior and/or relationships

Has their use of substances led to poor judgement or irrational behavior?

Have their actions led to:

Decreased quality and/or efficiency at work
Being late to work or poor attendance
Behavior that jeopardizes their safety and/or that of others
Accidents at work or at social functions
Motor vehicle citations or accidents
Relationship problems
Increased likelihood of committing crimes or being a victim of a crime
Legal problems as a result of personal interactions (friends, neighbors, workplace, general public, etc.)
Financial problems
Engaging in risky, unprotected sex, or showing signs of sexual abuse, date rape
Evidence of self-inflicted physical harm
Talk about hurting, or perhaps killing others
Talk about suicide

Learn more about alcohol or substance use

What consequences have you experienced?

Uncomfortable around them
Make excuses for, or justify, their behavior
Lack of trust
Lack of ability to maintain (or grow) a positive relationship
Concern for them causes your mental/physical health to suffer
- - Lack of sleep
  - Heightened anxiety or depression
  - Changes in your schedule to accommodate their dependency
Sense of powerlessness or insecurity
- - Is it your place to intercede?
  - Don’t know how to broach the subject (see Link “How to Talk To Someone”
  - Fear of losing friendship/relationship
  - Fear that if you withdraw from the friendship/relationship something bad will happen to them
  - Fear of retaliation
  - Don’t know what resources are available to help them or you

What is the difference between enabling and intervention?

Enabling behavior

Giving or lending them money
Making excuses for them
Paying their bills
Allowing them to stay with you
Lending them your tools when they have lost, pawned or forgotten theirs
Cleaning up their messes (physical, social, occupational or legal)
Tolerating habitual relapses
Setting ultimatums and not following through

Intervention Tips

Stop denying that a problem exists
Don’t fear the outcome
Set boundaries – and enforce them
Detach with empathy/concern
Help them find recovery support
Show compassion and support when/if they enter recovery

Behind the Scenes Foundation makes no representations or warranty whatsoever, either expressed or implied, regarding any information or advice provided by this training. In no event shall Behind the Scenes Foundation be liable to you or anyone else for any decision or action taken in reliance on information provided by this training.